raugust's Blog

Richard’s Rules for Survival in the Office.



In light of recent events in the lives of so many American workers, including my own, I propose the following list of rules for survival in any workplace, especially "The Office."
1.  Limit your conversation between yourself and other co-workers strictly to job-related issues.  Keep it "strictly business."  Do not discuss anything else with your co-workers.  Try to limit your conversation and Emails between yourself and your co-workers only to what relates to the job and business relating to both of you.
2.  If a co-worker tries to discuss his or her personal business with you, and it does not relate to you and your job, politely end the conversation by stating that it is none of your business.  Remember, work is not a social club or pick-up joint; work is WORK.  If the co-worker needs counseling, suggest he or she talk to Human Resources or a licensed, professional counselor.
3.  Keep your work AT WORK and your home AT HOME.  Do not conduct personal business at work unless you absolutely must do so AT BREAKTIME or LUNCHTIME.
4.  Do not attempt to make close friends with your co-workers.  Again, work is not a social club or a pick-up joint.  If you make a friend, fine, but keep things strictly business.
5.  Speak only about work-related issues.  Do not talk about trivia or college-knowledge or family or anything else other than what is directly work related.  No one else is interested in that!  Do not comment about anyone else on the job except to give constructive criticism as it relates to the job.  Do not comment about anyone else related to your job who does not work there at all!!
6.  Remember, what is in your possession, at your desk, is never EVER really yours.  It belongs to the COMPANY.  Company officials can and will search it and investigate it.  This is especially true regarding Emails, notes, pictures, verbal communication, and other office communications.  Other people will also use your computer, your files, and anything else you may have on "your" desk.  Any files you put on the computer, such as pictures, Emails, music, or non-work related documents, can put you on the spot, on the carpet, or on the unemployment line!  Depending on their content, they may also put YOU in JAIL.
To borrow a national security and defense contractor phrase from World War 2, "A slip of the lip can sink a ship!"  One slip of YOUR lip can sink YOUR ship when it comes to your job, your career, or your life!!